This is a difficult post to write. Difficult because I now know that if I tip my hand, the trolls will jump on the bandwagon again. But I have to get this out of my system. Even if I have to be a bit cryptic in my delivery so as not to invite the uninvited.
I am so disgusted with people right now. I am just mortified at the levels to which people will sink. We lost someone recently, and we dealt with that loss as best as we could — virtual hugs, shared tears. We paid tribute to a person that we’d never met face-to-face but yet had touched our lives.
But in our attempt to get through it all — an undertaking that pales in comparison to what the family must be going through — we spoke. We spoke to each other in e-mails, in blogs, in forums.
And from the underbelly, from the darkest depths, they came. The trolls. They questioned. And they took the death of another human being lightly. It was bad enough when they did it at our sites, or in the forums. But they went to his site. What’s worse, they called his goddamn home. And his family, a family that was trying to cope with an untimely death, had to answer the phone. They had to delete the comments. They had to take the time away from the important things – the things that mattered – to deal with crap like this. Like them.
I feel somewhat responsible. I feel that by putting it out there, we perpetuated it. And I’m so sorry for that. It was just our way of dealing with the loss of someone we had come to know. But if I had know what it would do, I’d probably just have kept it a little more private.
Because for all the livin’ this old body has done, I guess I didn’t know just how low people could go.
November 13, 2007 at 5:48 pm
Even if I do expect it, I’m always unpleasantly surprised at how low some of us will go. Sorry you feel responsible, you are not. You had good intentions, and are not responsible for those morons…
November 13, 2007 at 6:17 pm
Ugh. I just can’t believe that people put so much energy into something so horrible and that, quite honestly, didn’t concern them one way or the other.
You, however, are NOT responsible. I thank you for sharing him with me and I’m happy that I spent time going back and reading his posts.
My prayers are with his family.
November 13, 2007 at 6:41 pm
Not your fault. Some people are just born mean.
November 13, 2007 at 6:43 pm
I am constantly surprised by the amount of people that live just to cause other people pain. Not your fault, trolls take the best of intentions and turn them to their own ends.
November 13, 2007 at 7:48 pm
You’re not at fault in any way, shape or form. The people at fault are the asshats who took the situation and turned it into mayhem. You said it all when you stated it was none of their business.
November 13, 2007 at 7:48 pm
I blame Geg.
Why you might ask? Because Geg is a person that I don’t know. That makes Geg strange. Strange people are dangerous and often to blame for many things. Besides, when I blame random people that I don’t know it makes me feel superior.
Same thing. Don’t let it bother you.
Oh and Geg, I’m just kidding*.
–Stew
*I’m lying, you scare me aiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeee
November 13, 2007 at 8:19 pm
You are not at fault here, Wordnerd. No way could you have known that people would respond in that manner. I was appalled and saddened by it all, and I wondered how in the world people could be so cynical and mean. It is not in my nature or in my experience to be like that, thank God!
November 13, 2007 at 8:49 pm
Stew calling someone else strange.
Heh.
November 13, 2007 at 8:58 pm
Hold your goodness forth like a lighthouse steadfast against an angry and uncaring sea, beckoning to all weary souls, promising friendship, understanding, and sanity.
The light of your character shames the cockroaches to scurry back to the dank futility of their cowards’ dens.
And up there, he is hugging your light and laughing.
November 13, 2007 at 9:36 pm
I’m with everyone else here.
I am at a loss regarding the sickos that commented on his blog and called his family.
I’m used to mean; they are simply sick and cruel.
November 13, 2007 at 9:52 pm
I am trying very hard to be a half-full glass kind of person these days. Not so easy.
November 13, 2007 at 9:57 pm
I don’t even like stew. I prefer soup.
November 13, 2007 at 11:00 pm
People who are willing to stoop to that level of nastiness don’t need anyone else to enable it. They’ll find a way, regardless.
Still. The guilt is insidious and nasty. I hope it fades quickly…
November 13, 2007 at 11:04 pm
Now it might or might not be low to leave a comment or two that is ill conceived. While I would not do it, I am an ACLU kinda guy, so I allow some freedom of speech etc.
but when you go out of call peoples homes, and comment graffitti there own blog just because you dont agree thats low. Its like coming into my house uninvited and yelling about being Pro Life and then painting on my walls. Get the hell out if you wont listen.
November 13, 2007 at 11:04 pm
Stew is good, if you stick carrots in. But we digress.
WN, you must not spend much time at Fark (or other, less-monitored forums). I’ve lurked there quite a lot, and there are people who spend entire days simply rattling whichever cages will make a noise. People who look at real objects and insist they’re photoshopped, say mean things about faith and mothers and anything another person values.
This is much more personal than getting flipped off in traffic. But the troll has the same amount of power as the bird flipper: only that which is given by the flippee.
Good job on giving them less.
November 13, 2007 at 11:08 pm
Unfortunately, there are bitter, unhappy people everywhere. Blogging is simply an easy, fertile ground for them to breed like rabbits. No offense to rabbits, of course.
November 14, 2007 at 1:03 am
I don’t know what you’re talking about, but if someone made you mad and hurt you then I don’t like them! If people harrassed a grieving family, that’s simply disgusting.
November 14, 2007 at 6:14 am
Any time you choose the path of goodness and light you have nothing to fear from the evils that inadvertantly result. If your motives were pure and you honestly came to this with the idea that you were sharing something positive you are to be commended. If somebody took what you wrote, or came in the door you opened and turned things ugly, that is not your fault.
Any act of decency and goodness has the potential to be twisted into ugliness by certain people. That doesn’t mean we should stop doing good things. When we lose our faith in humanity and stop believing that good people are out there the trolls win.
There have always been trolls. There always will be. But mankind is made up of mostly good people doing good things. If we stop doing kindnesses because of the fear of trolls the world becomes a much more unpleasant place.
You set an example.
I am proud of you.
November 14, 2007 at 8:36 am
It all depends on where the carrots are stuck and who is doing the sticking.
November 14, 2007 at 12:03 pm
I wondered where you were.
Please don’t let them upset you. Then they have won. And you can’t let them do that.People who go out of their way to be cruel and thoughtless when they don’t have to be are the lowest forms of life.
They should be given nothing, not even a moment more of our time.
You were an honorable friend. A good friend. Remember that instead. You can send me an e-mail if you want to talk.
November 14, 2007 at 2:16 pm
No good deed goes unpunished. We now know it’s true.
People amaze me.
November 14, 2007 at 3:48 pm
Its hard to keep it private when the loss also spread onto here where we are. He shared with us through the internet so we had to mourn him through it too. And that is how it should be…regardless of the trolls. If they were in your shoes they would do/feel the same way. It is amazing how cruel and insensitive people can be..and though that hurts…try not to let it discourage you from doing what you think is best when it comes to a situation like this.
I do feel for his family though…how very unfair to them. They have enough to deal with already.
November 14, 2007 at 5:29 pm
As you know- I’m Pollyanna and it comes back to bite me every once in a while. But you know what? I’m not going to quit wishing that this world is a kinder place.
I’m really sorry that this happened to his family. It’s so amazing to me to see how low people can be. I’m just shaking my head at this.
Keep being who you are. You did this out of kindness and caring, and that’s what matters.
November 14, 2007 at 6:11 pm
Perry on Scrubs said it best, and I totally agree
People are bastard coaated bastards with bastard filling.
November 14, 2007 at 6:19 pm
I know what you mean. Nothing gets to me more than hateful, cruel, petty acts by one human upon another.
But then I see someone like you.
November 15, 2007 at 2:28 am
Stew is chunky unless you use a blender. Makes soup.
Stew probably went after Geg because thats almost Greg.
What, the trolls are loose?! Again?
November 21, 2007 at 4:29 pm
Nevertheless, of all the folks posting tributes to the late Blitz Krieg, none of them have ever really met him in person. There so far has never been an obituary posted in the local newspaper (unless perhaps Daniel Krieg was not his real name and just one he used for posting purposes). I agree that calling his home is crossing a line, but the entire story is still intriguing from an investigative reporter’s point of view…no one can ever confirm actually meeting this person, he posted one very cropped photo of an eye patch and nothing more (usually such a regular poster and someone sending out a warning about the possibilities of staph infection would post the more detailed photos that he’d promised). I guess the bottom line is that everyone is up in arms at the intrusion into Dr. Syn’s private life, but in fact he is the one who made his life public in the first place. And if said life was fiction, it wouldn’t be the first time it happened.