Today I am unable to complete anything at all, so I’m not sure why I even thought I’d be able to complete a post. But because I care about you guys, really, really care, I just couldn’t send you into your weekend without a couple of words to grace your Friday.
That and I can’t concentrate on work.

Not that I can concentrate here, either, but the standards are much, much lower.

So there’s all this random stuff bouncing around in my head, particularly because I have the head cold from hell and all those ugly little Mucin*x goblins are obviously having a good old time in there. What is it about that commercial that is supposed to be so appealing, by the way? I mean, they are animated snot-balls, for the love of Pete. Who leave ugly green footprints. It’s by far one of the most disgusting ad campaigns I have ever seen (rivalling only the mother-daughter tender moment when daughter tells mom, “sometimes I just don’t feel so fresh…”). This does not make me want to run out and buy your product, Mr. Madison Avenue. It makes me want to hurl violently.

Know what else makes me go hmmm? What is it with the cameramen at sporting events lately? As you are probably aware, I’ve been watching a LOT of football lately, and, well, I am beginning to wonder if they aren’t just selecting their cameramen from some crazy reality show on Channel 23. The other night, while watching LSU put a whuppin’ on Notre Dame, there was an incredibly long pass completion which we were forced to watch on replay because it was more important, at that particular point, to show the Notre Dame band bench-pressing one of its bandmembers. During the Louisville bowl game, we caught exactly 217 shots of a skanky-lookin’ chick dressed in red and black. It’s like Olympia Dukakis in “Steel Magnolias,” in which she, quite literally, does the color commentary. (And, by the way, if you have not seen that particular movie, you should do so straightaway, if only for that scene.) Just sayin’.

Oh. And another thing? What’s with the media always quoting a person as saying a school shooting was “senseless?” Have you ever, in your life, known of a sensible school shooting? Has it ever occurred to you, upon hearing of such horror, to say, “Well, it’s about time someone came to their senses”? I mean, sheesh. It’s as bad as “he was always a quiet guy, kept to himself…” Um, yeah. Psychopaths aren’t generally the head of the homeowners’ association, now, are they?

There is no segue here. There is no transition. No flow. This is just the last paragraph and you, my friends, are left to wonder. You are left to say, what the hell? You are left to say, “Now THAT was totally senseless.” See you Monday, if the little green goblins don’t carry me off.

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