Learning came almost too easily. He couldn’t stand the repetition. He got it the first time. Then he would become bored. And leave his seat. Teachers said “test him, I think he has ADD, ADHD, blah-D-D.” We tested him, because we felt we had no choice. And because it’s always fun to spend hundreds of dollars to satisfy the school administration. Only to be told he’s perfectly fine. “He’s oppositional. He’s defiant.” No, ma’am. Sorry. He’s neither. He’s just tired of the crap. He’s tired of the labels you have placed on him and the bullseye you’ve affixed to his character. And he will succeed, despite your every attempt to see that he doesn’t. Ever hear of a self-fulfilling prophecy? It. Will. Not. Happen.
He graduated 8th grade near the top of his class. He gained admission to a national school of excellence. He has his whole life ahead of him. And he will succeed.
He has always had our love and support, and that will only grow in the years ahead. And he has his wonderful brain, which will become more fully developed and nourished.
Fourteen years ago I held him for the first time. Today I left him at high school for the first time.
Martin, we love you more than you’ll ever know. Until you have your own child, you can never know the love we feel for you. A friend once told me, just after having had his first child, “Now I know what it’s like to have someone you’d be willing to throw yourself in front of a bus for.” I hope you know how proud we are, and how much we believe in the incredible human being that you are. Go forward, and always remember what Thomas Edison said: “Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”
Never give up.
August 9, 2006 at 8:37 am
What a tribute to a great young man. And actually, he had a good example from his parents to be able to overcome society’s labels.
August 9, 2006 at 8:49 am
Incredible tribute to an obviously incredible young man.
August 9, 2006 at 9:52 am
Beautifully put.
August 9, 2006 at 9:54 am
That’s great that he didn’t believe in his teacher’s low expectations. Congrats on getting one successfully through middle school!
August 9, 2006 at 9:59 am
That’s a classic.
As he is.
I know where he gets it…
August 9, 2006 at 10:02 am
Damn. That is all.
August 9, 2006 at 10:20 am
OMG!
Your son is so grown! and brainy!
YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!
Your husband is hot, too!
Martin, keep kicking butt in school and prove them all wrong.
August 9, 2006 at 10:26 am
WN – the struggling was worth it. The faith you place in this boy will stand him is good stead throughout his life. Beautiful beautiful post…
August 9, 2006 at 12:08 pm
wow. that gives me hope for my own boy! it’s not always easy dealing with the school system.
August 9, 2006 at 12:34 pm
Very sweet post. Thanks for sharing.
August 9, 2006 at 4:50 pm
Wow. Just wow.
Nooze starts kindergarten in three weeks. Care to come to NC to help see her off?
August 9, 2006 at 10:55 pm
You’re making me cry because that was beautiful. Plus, I can’t stop thinking about Leah going off to high school now. : * (
August 10, 2006 at 7:15 am
You did good, really good! Because you write really good and you did not listen to “them”. We, as parents, know our children and what they are capable of doing, and it’s our job to make sure we do good by them and you did really good 🙂
p.s. and now we know what you look like!
August 10, 2006 at 7:17 am
me again, obviously my vocabulary of words is not as complete as yours,(using the word “good” more than once) but then again I’m French, so I have an excuse LOL
August 10, 2006 at 8:27 am
Thanks for sharing. You have a great kid! I am wishing him, and you, both parents the same love and success you had within the family so far.
On a side note: We are also coping with the ‘Your child is a serious case of ADHD-blah-HD’ thingy. He’s only into the fourth class this September, but it’s his 3rd school. (Please note that he started it at the age of 6y,9m – as the system here is quite different from that of yours.)
We also trust him and try to encourage him. It’s not his failure that his mind is so open to every information and suggesting this can’t be justified…
On another side note: I really, REALLY disagree with your friend. If a parent puts him/herself to death, like by getting under a bus, that is the stupidiest thing a parent can do. No kids should want neither admire self-sacrifice THIS useless and stupid.
SOrry again, it’s just me.
Congratulations, you have a great kid!!!
August 10, 2006 at 9:52 am
Just beautiful.
August 10, 2006 at 11:09 am
Yay! doing well! And you all look good 🙂 You know pretty soon it will seem normal. I remember how that has come and gone.
August 10, 2006 at 2:03 pm
A beautiful tribute to what appears to be a beautiful person. Thanks for sharing it here.
August 10, 2006 at 3:46 pm
Ok, let me get a tissue.
Oh wow! I see you! (and you don’t even look like Liza Minelli!)
Nice post.
August 10, 2006 at 4:26 pm
Awww shucks. That is so sweet! Nice pic! Looks like your hubby is tall like mine (or maybe he just looks tall next to you? – tee hee) Off to High School? Ugh. I am not looking forward to that day!
August 10, 2006 at 4:52 pm
Beautiful. Simply beautiful. Thank you for taking the time to provide this extraordinary glimpse into what you have created.
August 10, 2006 at 4:57 pm
Congratulations! Please give him my “pat on the back” for a job well-done!!
August 10, 2006 at 10:25 pm
Congratulations Martin.
August 11, 2006 at 7:33 am
I’m alarmed by how many kids they medicate these days. I don’t think kids were made to sit for so long. My sons homeshcooled first and so they didn’t get burn-out to the degree most other kids did. Congratulations to your son from mem and michele!
August 11, 2006 at 8:20 am
A lovely way to start my day. What a lovely tribute to your son.
Tell him happy belated birthday from me, OK?
August 11, 2006 at 8:57 am
Hooray for Martin! (And for you, too!)
Schools are far too eager to label students “ADD” and declare that what they really need are drugs to make them more manageable. Good for both of you for sticking to your guns and letting him be himself. 🙂
August 11, 2006 at 9:51 am
What a sweet post. And I absolutely love that quote. I will have to reflect on that because it is oh so true.
Michele says hi.
August 11, 2006 at 10:28 am
Lovely, just lovely.
Michele sent me.
August 11, 2006 at 11:28 am
His is so lucky that he has parents who also dont give in to labels and throw a bunch of pills at a problem. Good for you for recognizing his strengths and weaknesses and ensuring his success by never giving up. Here from Michele’s.
August 11, 2006 at 11:54 am
Beautiful tribute. He is a very lucky young man, to have you as a mother…
Michele sent me. Have a great weekend !
August 11, 2006 at 11:58 am
Why is it I’m impressed that he let you drive him to his first day of HS? Mine would have jumped in front of a train before he let me LOL
Here via Michele’s today 🙂
August 11, 2006 at 12:20 pm
Well, thumper, I wasn’t allowed to hug, kiss, wave, or acknowledge him in any way…feel better?
August 11, 2006 at 2:49 pm
Awww, this is so sweet! You’re right – it was certainly along the same lines as my post. Thanks for stopping by and I’m glad that I did the same! Sounds like he’s going to make you one proud mama!
August 11, 2006 at 6:58 pm
this made me cry. we have such responsibility as parents. mine is only two and a half but i can already see how society pushes and pulls you until you fit into a particular mould. and if you don’t, then they label you and discard you.
congratulations on being so strong and seeing your son grow and succeed. he’s a reflection of you.
here from michele’s today!
August 11, 2006 at 8:30 pm
your son is lucky to have a mother who fights for his abilities–and Martin is such a great name.
Michele sent me.
August 13, 2006 at 10:07 pm
Hello, Michele sent me. What a great story, and congratulations to you and your son.