Damn, I wish I was smart and had me some culture. Man! I’ve been missin’ out. See, if I had me some of that culture, I could understand why someone, anyone, would shell out 23.8 million dollars for this sculpture (pictured at right, if Blogger cooperates). 23.8 million bones!!! Oh. My. Gawd. This isn’t art, people. This is what my kids did with wooden blocks when they were two! This is another prime example of the “Emperor’s New Clothes” mentality I talked about a while back. This monstrosity was predicted to go in the 12-million-dollar range. But Joe Artsnob bid almost twice that amount. Am I alone in wondering what the hell is happening here? It doesn’t take an act of genius to figure out how much good that amount of money could do. It doesn’t take an act of genius to realize that that amount of money could retire the debt of a small nation, put my dear friends in New Orleans back in their homes and give a wonderful city the kickstart it needs, or feed a lot, I mean a lot, of people. I mean, I’m no advocate of public handouts by any stretch of the imagination, but the artsy-fartsy world supposedly is. That’s their thing. So how can the “art” world justify something like this? Listen. I appreciate fine art. There are paintings that I could literally lose myself in for hours. I believe the world is enriched by the presence of art, music, good books. But this isn’t art, dammit, and you know it. So do you. And you. I can’t stop looking at it. And not because it’s fascinating.
Is there something wrong with me? Am I supposed to gasp in awe at the sheer beauty of metal balanced not-even-precariously on more metal? What am I missing here? Who is going to stop the madness? Me and my eight loyal readers? Art Idiots, unite. Rise up against the Art Snobs. Tell them to take a long, hard look at what they consider worth 23.8 million dollars. Then get back to us. We’ll be out here. In the real world.